Holistic Sex

by Drew Gerald (Mindvalley, 2014)

No Longer Available

For The Conscious Lover Who
Is Ready To Master Their Sex Life…

The Most Enlightening & Pleasurable Path To Sexual & Spiritual Fulfillment

Are you unconsciously allowing hidden fear, insecurity, uncertainty, guilt, shame, frustration, or confusion keep you from the pleasure, connection, and passion you truly desire?

Your sex life isn’t how you imaged it.

You may be single; feeling lonely, frustrated, sad, or upset with the opposite sex. Perhaps you’re in a relationship where the sex has fizzled out – or never really reached that peak to begin with. You know, the monotony, drudgery, and lack of sexual satisfaction that’s filling up the space inside of you where excitement and ecstasy should be instead.

Or, on the other side of the spectrum, maybe you have a great sex life and just long to reach the purest, most evolved, enlightened sex and relationship possible. To heal the traumas, and move past the shame, guilt, insecurities, and fears that are holding you and your partner back from sharing profound pleasure, love, and connection with each other.

For most of us, sexual satisfaction doesn’t automatically happen as a result of living. We’re simply not taught how to open into intimacy and make love, give and receive explosive orgasms, or how to discover and deal with our emotional blocks. If you’re feeling any of these things, know that it’s not your fault – you’re not broken, and there’s nothing wrong with who you are.

But still… you know something’s just not right

Can You Relate To Any of These People?

“I was lying there in bed, things were flowing and we were both feeling incredible. I had the thought come up again, of doing something taboo… I really wanted to try it but what would my partner think? The look of disgust and disapproval of my last lover flashed through my mind. I felt the shame and rejection wash through my body just thinking about it… so I decided not to bring it up. Now I regret not sharing my true desires.”

“I really want to follow the correct spiritual path, but I just crave wild sex. I’m conflicted because I just want to do the right thing… but I’m not sure what that is.”

“I don’t feel like I’m manly enough. I’m constantly worried that I’m not masculine enough in bed, but I don’t like being a macho jerk. Honestly, I’m not even really sure what it means to “be in my masculine” anyway.

“No matter how many books I read and techniques I try, I still don’t feel any more confident or satisfied in bed. It’s like the harder I try to be a good lover, the more frustrated I get!

“We were having sex on the fifth date and I don’t know what came over me. I felt this urge to talk dirty, to let loose. I wanted him to call me explicit names, I wanted him to take control and dominate me. I wanted to scream like an animal. These feelings were intense; it was as if every inch of my body was on fire, aching to be ravished. But I was afraid. I didn’t want him to think I was a slut. I wanted him to respect me. I respect myself… yet… I want to be taken. He wasn’t saying anything either, and we both ended up just getting awkward and uncomfortable.”

“My relationships are actually pretty good, but I want to take things to the next level. I don’t want good-enough, I want mastery.”

“I spent an hour pleasuring her… but it was no use. All I wanted to do was make her happy… to satisfy her and see her explode in pleasure. To feel the connection cumming brings us. But I couldn’t. She couldn’t. I feel like I let her down; like a failure. I know she has orgasmed with past boyfriends, but not with me. I’ve tried all sorts of techniques. I feel inadequate and she feels like there’s something wrong with her.”

“I was always told masturbation was a sin. Church, school, you name it. My parents told me it was wrong to touch myself in any way, and that sex should wait ’till after marriage. But I do. It feels both wrong and pleasurable at the same time. I don’t think I’m a bad person, but it sure feels like it.”

“I seem to keep attracting the same kind of disappointing relationships. Nobody treats me right and I can’t find anyone that makes me happy, even though I give so much!”

We go through life settling for these types scenarios as fact. We’ve been told “that’s just how things are”.

But what about your dreams?

What about that voice deep inside that is still holding on to the possibility of true love, connection, depth, and passion? Of achieving all the wonderful things that make relationships worth having and life worth living?

There’s a place deep inside, where you store visions of an ideal sex life.

Stop. Stop thinking about it and feel into it. Allow yourself to go there now.

Indulge for a few moments and imagine your ideal sex life if you had nothing holding you back and an abundance of everything you could ever want…

  • What would sex like that look and feel like, physically and emotionally?
  • What sounds and words come out… are they soft or loud?
  • What tastes fill your mouth? Which scents drive you wild?
  • How often do you have sex – once a week, multiple times a day?
  • What fantasies are you role-playing? What kinks do you express?
  • How much joy are you getting from pleasuring them and vice-versa?
  • What is it like to experience such a divine spiritual union while you make love?
  • Are you longing to have a child? What would it be like to bring new life into the world through intimacy?
  • How does it feel to have all your energy centers turned on and connected?
  • How do you move through the world differently being so confident, satisfied, fulfilled, adored, loved, and respected?

This is how your sex life should be …so why isn’t it that way now? Why have you not been able to manifest the love life you desire?

Why Your Sex Life Isn’t What It Could Be

There are specific reasons why, and they’re actually quite simple:

  • The confusion you feel is because your knowledge is outdated by newer experiences, and the clarity you seek is causing discord until you gain new awareness.
  • The loneliness you feel is because you’re missing a few simple foundational keys, that once you learn, unlock the path towards love and connection.
  • The fear you feel is because you’re believing something that appears real-as-all-hell, but isn’t true – and once you master your beliefs, that fear will vanish.
  • The lack of physical satisfaction or emotional fulfillment you’re feeling comes from the same void – not the lack of a partner or the lack of their abilities – but yourself.
  • The guilt or shame you feel around truly expressing your deepest sexual desires and kinks isn’t because you’re fucked up; it’s because you’ve been conditioned to think these are wrong.
  • The insecurities you have aren’t because you’re messed up or inadequate, but because your default patterns of thought are working against you.

Notice that none of these are mystical or mysterious. We like to complicate things.

Years ago I heard a sensei say: “It’s not in practicing 10,000 different punches once; it’s practicing a single simple punch 10,000 times.”

Our egos like to think it’s the fancy “advanced” techniques that indicate mastery, but it’s not.

Mastery is in the foundation.

If you haven’t developed the right foundation of thinking, feeling, or relating beforehand – the most advanced tricks will always fall short. You can do every secret method… and STILL feel empty inside.

This is why you don’t have what you want in life.

It’s NOT because you don’t know some ancient secret from deep in the mountains of Tibet.

It’s because you require an empowering philosophy and foundation to sex to support you.

Your conditionings are what’s holding you back from that.

These are the fears, insecurities, limiting beliefs, guilt, sadness, despair, lies, and unworthiness that you’ve bought into… all without knowing. As we grow up, our parents, peers, churches, culture, media, marketing – all of that has influenced the way we see ourselves and sex. Most of this has been accepted by us without our consent.

This happens through experience and repeated conditionings as we grow up. We become jaded, experience horrific traumas, and are taught beliefs that aren’t empowering.

Think for a moment what you believe about yourself, women, men, relationships, sex, and spirituality. Where did these concepts come from? Are they still serving you? What mythologies are you living out?

How You’ve Been Brainwashed

Have you ever heard (or even believe for yourself) any of the following:

  • “Men like sex more than women.”
  • “Women don’t even enjoy sex.”
  • “Sex is dirty.”
  • “Certain sex acts are wrong.”
  • “Women who have too much sex are sluts.”
  • “Men just use women for sex.”
  • “Women just want a rich, muscular, well-hung man.”
  • “All men/women are the same.”
  • “Masturbation is a sin. It must be transcended to be loved by God.”
  • “Spirituality and sexuality are incompatible and mutually exclusive.”
  • “You should be ashamed for having sex outside of marriage.”
  • “There’s something wrong with people who are into ____.”
  • “Sex is only meant for procreation.”
  • “You’re not good enough.”
  • “You’re too old to get married and have kids.”
  • “She only attracts the wrong kind of men.”
  • “Relationships are supposed to be a struggle.”
  • “You’re not worthy of love.”
  • “You must get into a relationship that pleases your parents.”

These are conditionings. We weren’t born with these ideas, we had to learn them somehow.

You’ve heard these views before – they permeate our culture. Some of us actively believe and preach them, while some of us store these beliefs at a more subconscious, hidden level. While not right or wrong, these ideas can be incredibly disempowering and result in dysfunctional relationships.

Again, none of what was taught to you growing up is your fault.

However, it IS now up to you to do something about it as an adult.

“Okay that’s great and all, but WHAT CAN I DO? Isn’t this just who I am? Isn’t this just how things are?

Actually, it’s not.

Who you REALLY ARE is a loving, abundant, sexual, powerful being. These conditionings aren’t you; they’re just stories you’ve adopted along the way for protection.

They don’t feel good because they’re no longer serving you.

The path to sexual satisfaction and fulfillment is about discovering these conditionings which hold us back, letting go of our judgements, stopping the same old stories, and then adopting more empowering perspectives. It is more of a “letting go” than a “learning more”.

In a moment, I will share how to discover these conditionings, clear them, and adopt the most powerful sexual paradigm that exists.

Improve Your Sex by 300%

The basis of Holistic Sex is “The 4 Levels” – the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual levels of being.

Here’s the “simple trick” to satisfying your lover: arouse, stimulate, and satisfy your lover on all 4 of these levels and you will approach sex with 300% more stimulation than almost all porn. Most people only approach sex from the physical and miss 3/4 of what’s possible.

How does this look in real life?

  • Physically Arouse: Touch, taste, lick, massage, suck, breathe, grind, thrust, finger, and dance.
  • Emotionally Arouse: Drop into your body and feel yourself and them, share your heart and connect with your eyes, express your desire and affection, describe how close you feel to them.
  • Mentally Arouse: Tell erotic stories, sext, have phone sex, tease and allude, be suggestive, talk dirty, enact fantasies, and role-plays.
  • Spiritually Arouse: Breathe and exhale each other, move energy, radiate love through your life purpose, incorporate sacred elements to sex, or set up an altar to sacrifice virgins to the gods.

(Just kidding on that last one… or am I?)

Obviously there’s a lot more than just a few bullet points, and I go deeper in the course, but you see that sex can be so much more than “getting physical”.

On my journey, I realized that one of the biggest conflicts in the world is between our sexuality and spirituality. This is closely followed by the conflict between men and women – the battle between masculine and feminine.

These ancient conflicts – seen both outside in the world and inside of our own psyche – is the basis of this mastery course.

Resolving these conflicts in myself opened me to a world in which love and sex became gracious and peaceful. As my clients began to resolve the conflicts of polarity, the battle of the sexes, and the war against sex and spirit – their results in the bedroom took off. It became apparent that you don’t become a Remarkable Lover simply by technique – you must transform your attitudes, beliefs, and mythologies as well.

I decided to take the best ideas and perspectives I learned from all schools of thought, and compile them into a core philosophy which I call “Holistic Sex”.

This has developed into an entire mastery course, empowering you with everything you need to know to transform your relationships. You’re about to discover the culmination of a decade of learning, years of work and original ideas, and thousands of years of wisdom vetted into a single source.

Holistic Sex was designed to be a complete approach to sex that merges the dirty, sultry, sexy, and erotic parts of our sexuality – with the loving, spiritual, profound, and expansive parts of our sexuality.

By combining the the divine with the “dirty” we can resolve our internal conflicts and use that energy to grow, heal, and have phenomenal sex.

If you…

  • Wish to experience explosive orgasms, deeper connected sex, and more intimacy…
  • Have ever felt unfulfilled or experience a lack of desire when you felt like you should have…
  • Wish you could understand yourself, your shadow, and what’s holding you back…
  • Feel your fears, insecurities, and guilt arise in bed rather than your pleasure…
  • Feel inadequate about your “performance” or shortcomings…
  • Are looking for somebody who loves you for who you are, rather than forces a dogma via fear or punishment…

Then “Holistic Sex” will help you…

  • Discover and learn to satisfy your (and your partner’s) basic intimate needs – what we really want, not just what we think or say we do
  • Experience more pleasure, feel better, evoke higher arousal, and achieve orgasms easier
  • Learn how to develop deeper connections and form stronger bonds (or purposely know how not to!)
  • Finally open yourself to real, authentic, true love – causing you to attract (and become attractive to) higher quality lovers
  • Break free of your dogma, and achieve the freedom to fully express your desires and kinks (even remove the obstacles to dirty talk)
  • Learn secret sexual wisdom; the most advanced and complete sexual theories and concepts to achieve mastery of your sex life
  • Find the TRUE path to sexual enlightenment, and achieve spiritual fulfillment along with animalistic satisfaction

The Curriculum For Sexual & Spiritual Mastery

Part 1: Introduction to Holistic Sex

  • I explain why I created this course and exactly how it’s going to help you
  • I share how you can increase the satisfaction of your lover by 75%
  • The 5 “rules” we use to filter all ideas around sex and love so you know they are the best for you
  • The 7 different “motivations” you and your lover have toward sex that will allow you to understand the desires of your partner and how to connect in their language

Part 2: Our Sexual Conditionings

  • I tell you why you limit yourself and how your insecurities, fears, and guilt came about that’s completely not your fault
  • How to identify the dogmas and taboos that are holding you back from the sex and love you truly deserve
  • I share the 23 “false beliefs” that you think are true but are actually at the core of your suffering (these ideas come from such loving truth, I’ve actually cried with overwhelm)

Part 3: Sexual Polarity

  • Discover the truth about polarity, and what the dance between the masculine and the feminine means to you
  • You’ll relearn the truth about duality and oneness, and develop the capacity to understand the world around you
  • I give practical examples and real-world application on how to use polarization in bed, so you’ll be able to achieve tangible results not just theory
  • Learn the differences between the masculine and feminine on a meta level so you have better understanding of each
  • The secret to sexual attraction – this one “Law of Sexual Polarity” is the most powerful concept that explains how to create passion, sexual tension, and explosive, steamy hot sex
  • I break apart and address each polarity/gender separately, so you’ll receive specific insights for your exact needs
  • You’ll learn the 6 major characteristics of each polarity and how to master them for improving not only your relationships, but your entire life
  • I share the inside scoop on how to deal with the opposite sex (pole) so you’ll finally understand why you have so many conflicts in communication and how to actually fix it

Part 4: Redefining Relationships

  • I will expose why the way most people see relationships is completely wrong, and then define it in a new manner which will increase the quality of your relationships tenfold from the start
  • You’ll discover what your partner really needs and how to give it to them
  • You will learn how to utilize paradox to your advantage, giving you the ability to accept ideas that appear to be in conflict (but really aren’t)
  • The one key that will unlock your ability to harness both the dirty, explicit, naughty side of your sex with the loving, spiritual, connecting side – simultaneously
  • How to merge the dirty and the divine, the spiritual and the slutty… along with Tantra, Taoism, BDSM & Kink

Part 5: Holistic Approach to Sex

  • The secret to getting your partner to LOVE pleasuring you
  • How to satisfy both partner’s different approaches to sex
  • The right and wrong way to protect yourself (and I don’t mean condoms)
  • How to make sex win-win, not a tug-of-war (this can greatly eliminate the core cause for much fighting)
  • Why this one thing you do in the beginning of relationships MUST continue throughout, or else the sex becomes mundane or obligatory
  • The truth about “holding space” and what it actually means for lovers
  • The #1 reason why the smartest, most intelligent men are the WORST lovers in the world (and how to make them some of the BEST)
  • Why your desire to control everything is ruining your sex life (not making it perfect)
  • Once you learn this simple theory or “law” behind sexual pleasure, you’ll have mastery over any pleasure technique
  • Why masturbation should be approached differently for men and women, and the reason behind the female orgasm epidemic
  • The reason why you should forget foreplay – and yes I’ll say it: foreplay sucks
  • You’ll learn the secret key to unlocking female arousal – use this ridiculously easy 3-step sequence to turn your woman on… Every. Single. Time. (Almost every man does this backwards)
  • I explain how to use both loving and explicit “dirty” talk to create the best sex ever (but there’s nothing dirty about sexual communication)
  • You’ll understand how to utilize all those sexual fantasies to actually heal and liberate your lover, which in turn makes them more open to new sexual experience and compels your lover to be generous with you
  • I share the truth about role play, which will help you get over some blocks around experimenting with certain sexual activities
  • You’ll face your sexual shadow and shed light on the dark side of your sexuality, bringing love to all the suppressed aspects of your being
  • Do you ever fantasize about dark, politically incorrect things? I tell you why you’re not messed up and shouldn’t feel bad about it (hint: most people secretly have these), and how exploring these in a safe way can be euphoric and liberating
  • Does sex cause you to feel any anger, frustration, hate, or violence? We take care of that
  • How about shame, guilt, sadness, or hurt? Yep, I’ve got your back on that too

What’s The Cost Of NOT Learning This?

We only think about the cost of what something’s going to be right now when we receive it, but what about the cost of NOT knowing this information? There’s a massive financial, emotional, and time cost not having sexual and self-mastery that you’re not considering.

If you are (or end up) in a failing relationship…

What happens when your dry, passionless marriage ends in divorce because your partner is leaving you for a secret lover? This financial cost of divorce can be upwards of six figures – if not more. The time wasted and lost could be years. Your emotional pain and suffering would be unfathomable… could you really live with that guilt, shame and betrayal, just because you were too scared? If you have kids, your entire life is now 10x more complicated. Do you really want to explain to your children why mommy and daddy aren’t together anymore, or heaven forbid have them think it’s their fault?

If you’re single…

How would it feel knowing your dates lead nowhere because you unknowingly aren’t satisfying your potential partners? Do you really want to be alone for years, or even into old age and die lonely… or having settled? How much time, energy, and money have you already wasted on dead-end relationships or dates in the past year? What about the void between you and enjoying the rest of your life together with your soulmate?

I’m betting the price to pay for all of those are much more than I’m asking you to invest in yourself today.

Yes, it sucks thinking about these things, but look out into the world – you know these are real possibilities. It’s not fun, but neither is watching you live out the rest of your life unhappy when you had the chance to do something about it now. I’m not going to sugarcoat anything with rainbows and unicorns. You’re worth being told the truth, straight-up.

Get Access to Holistic Sex Now

Holistic Sex Is No Longer Available

About The Author

Drew Gerald is an entrepreneur, author, and director at the Center for Cinesomatic Development. His Cinesomatics® workshops are held internationally from New York to London, Tuscany to Switzerland—helping professionals see the elusive patterns that hold them back. This methodology leads the world in cinematic movement diagnostics and advanced intuition development integrating approaches from embodiment, shadow work, therapy, and spirituality.

He is the author of the book “Why You’re Still Stuck” (MetaHeal, 2020). In his early career, Drew coded a particle and physics engine by the age of 18⁠, used by top Fortune 100 companies over the 7 years of his software business. His first teaching work, “Holistic Sex” (Mindvalley, 2014), provided the world with a new paradigm that bridged the divide between sexuality, spirituality, and the sexes. Drew is also an advisor for the Alan Watts Organization.